Erasing the Lines in the Sand: All Foster Children Need a Loving Home with Loving Parents

My topic this week is to focus on lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning (LGBTQ) youth and the foster care system. As I researched this topic, I found myself to be a bit unqualified to discuss a big topic in a short blog. I find myself unable to effectively communicate the sadness I have for the challenges of LGBTQ youth in the foster care system and LGBT parents who want to create or expand their family by adoption through foster care. 

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Facts found online suggested LGBTQ youth are anywhere from two to eight times more likely to attempt suicide, three to eight times as likely to use drugs and six times as likely to experience depression. Many are likely to be forced out of their homes after disclosing their LGBTQ status to parents or foster parents. They are two times more likely to be threatened or injured, two times more likely to skip school, experience some form of anti-LGBTQ bias and bullying in foster care placement and schools, and experience prejudicial treatment than than their heterosexual peers. These facts are horrifying!

Many state agencies refuse to represent same-sex adoptive couples and they are often at the bottom of the list of homes for potential child placement. Recently, the City of Philadelphia was asked, in a court action, by Catholic Social Services (CSS) to refuse recruitment and licensing of same-sex couples seeking to foster children in need of a loving home for children in CSS's foster care program. 

There is a disproportionately number of youth in foster care who identify themselves LGBTQ. Many foster parents don't want to give or have the skills to provide a loving, accepting and understanding home for children who are going through the process of acknowledging their sexual orientation/gender identity. Isn't it about time society stands up again biases and prejudices to provide hurting children a safe home with unconditional loving and accepting parents, no matter their sexual orientation? 

We will be posting many challenges LGBTQ youth and foster parents experience this week on our various social media accounts, Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. Follow the conversation.  

Watch What You Say, Someone Is Listening

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During times of national crisis, governments promote messages to keep your lips closed because you never knew who was listening. Your neighbor could be a German spy or your co-worker could be a Russian operative. The lives of soldiers and civilians defending a country from aggressors were at stake. Life and death hung in the balance of a casual comment. 

Times have changed. Espionage novels, movies, the internet and 24 hour news channels has changed the landscape of warfare. But, what hasn't changed is the war for our minds by the words we use. 

Words have power. Words have meaning. 

Researchers have discovered the words a parent speaks to their children during the formative years of their life develop into their personality, affects their level of self-confidence and determines their future. A parent who tells a child they are stupid, an idiot, won't amount to anything, or are a mistake will suffer from learning disabilities, depression, anxiety, have a low self-esteem, and will not achieve the greatness they were created for. But in contrast, a parent who pours loving, encouraging, motivating and kind words into the life of a child, builds confidence, independence, positive attitude, and a belief in their abilities. 

The words a child hears will become the dialogue of their inner voice. The inner voice that follows them into school, into adulthood, into relationships, and into the workplace. They are the words they speak in their thoughts, say out loud and manifest into their life.  

What words were spoken over you? Were they positive or negative? What are the words you speak over yourself? Are they negative or positive? What words do you speak over your loved ones? We all have the opportunity and power to lift someone up or tear them down. It's time for a shift. A shift in your thinking, a shift in your words. 

We would love to hear your opinion. Let us know what you think below. 

Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life

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We are very pleased to have had to chance to sit down with Life Coach Mark Johnson to end our week on Power Thoughts. Mark had a foundation shaking event in his life about 11 years ago when his daughter when to be with the Lord. He explains how he was able to over come this challenge by choosing his thoughts. Visit our SoundCloud page for this podcast.  

Your Thoughts Determine Your Life

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Since we were born, words have been spoken over us. These words developed our thoughts about ourselves and other people. They are the foundation stones of our values, character and behavior. Author James Allen wrote in his 1902 book, As a Man Thinketh, “Each of us is literally what we think.” Our thoughts define who we are, what accomplish, how we react to circumstances, our health and body. 

Thought seeds have been scattered in our minds and hearts throughout our lifetime. Everyone we come in contact with are the planters gardeners who have spread and plant the seeds. Yet, we are the designers and creators who get to choose which seed takes root.

As all plants grow, shallow roots begin under the earth before we even see the leaves begin to grow. Seeds of praise, encouragement, and kindness produce self-confidence, can do attitude and a positive outlook on life. These are seeds we want to nurture, water, speak over and take care of. The harsh words of a bully, the betrayal of a good friend, the rejection by a parent, or lies people tell and say about us are bad seeds that produce a shame based, guilty and bitter outlook on life. These lies of destruction, darkness and despair need to be pulled out and burned with the rest of the trash in our life.

What happens if we decide to weed the garden of our mind and heart? What if we are honest with ourselves? What if we chose to repeat and believe the encouraging words good gardeners have spoken over us? I say, it would change our lives, it would set us free, and allow us to be who we were created to be. 

So, forgive the people who have said hurtful words or committed a wrong to you. Remember, as a man thinks, so he becomes. Who do you want to become?

Don't Suffer Bullying in Silence

We are honored to have had the opportunity to produce this video to bring awareness to National Bullying Prevention Month to our subscribers. Millions of people worldwide suffer in silence as they are bullied on a daily basis. Exclusion, name calling, physical or verbal abuse and harassment...at school, work or at home. It must stop. Stand up, be counted, be the miracle.

Let us know what you think.

Bullying: A Lifelong Epidemic

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When people think of bullies, an image of a middle school boy with a gang of followers come to mind. Similar to the scene in the 1983 film, A Christmas Story. The 1940s reflection of an American boy's dream of owning a Red Ryder BB gun as the perfect Christmas gift, depicts what many believe bullies act like. Ralphie, his brother, and friends were always on the look out and running away from Scut Farkus, with "his yellow eyes and signature coonskin cap", with Grover Dill in tow. Laughing, teasing, taunting, throwing snowballs, and making them say "uncle" to stop being punched. This film had a redeeming moment when Ralphie could no longer take abuse and turned the tables on Scut. But not every bullying situation resolves with the bully being defeated. 

Bullying is an all to common behavior in youth, but unfortunately it does not end when students cross the high school graduation stage. Bullying rears its ugly head in college class rooms when one student degrades, smirks and laughs a fellow classmate's opinion or answer to a question. It shows up in office settings when one co-worker repeatedly and persistently humiliates another in a power struggle for career advancement. It is present at the negotiation table with world leaders throughout the world. 

Bullying generally starts in the home, when a parent or family exerts their authority or gets what they want out of children by threats and violent intimidation. Comments such as "Shut up before I slap you", "You're so stupid" or "You'll never been good enough". Children learn behaviors by example and experience, therefore bullying in the home sets them on a damaged road into adulthood. Bullying creates a negative outlook on life. It leads to depression, helplessness, damaged self-esteem, and threat of emotional and physical health.  

Bullying touches every geographic location and demographics across the board, from age, gender, sexual orientation, religion, social, and economic standing. What would happen if a brave soul saw someone being bullied would step up, and speak out against the bully? What if someone offered a comforting word, showed a small act of kindness or became a friend to the victim? What if we said "ENOUGH"?

Tell us what your thoughts on bullying are.